[About how much he should be pushed? Isn't that idiocy? Silco is not someone who could ever be anywhere near an idiot. And yet...and yet....he keeps thrusting that spindly little hand in the bars of the lion cage. He bears a knife as if that would provide even the slightest mote of protection.]
[And yet, this is a man who has bested a beast in one aspect. Who toyed with him enough until he bared his teeth.]
[Vergilius steps closer, now, shoulders hunching up more. He's always never had the best posture in the world.]
[The knife is laughable. So he laughs. A hard, gruff little ha-ha.]
...Put that away. If you really didn't want to stop, act with your hands, and your hands alone. Not pathetic tools. Unless you feel scared enough to hide behind it?
About what nature of beast lurks beneath your skin, of course.
[ He says it like it should be so obvious, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. Silco respected power, he always had, but the manner of the type of power was always in question. When pushed into a corner, how did the beast react? When confronted with betrayal, or bloodshed, did the beast shirk away and hide in a corner, or seek out those with more power, or did they lash out, and excise the problem personally?
Silco was not a foolish man, but around such things, he so often lost his head in pursuit of power. He had no freedom to help buy for the people here, or product to peddle. He needed something else to pay for loyalty, because he has nothing else to supply. He wants to see this beast out of its cage β ideally with his hand at the leash β because there's something in the man that makes him hold back. Show restraint.
What is that that makes him pull back? Why is it that he hadn't crushed his head like a too-ripe fruit plucked from the refuse? What does he want out of this?
They'd sat on and talked about ending a world once; an opportunity Silco had held in his hands, and tried to cultivate for two years, fighting everything and everyone to ensure it happened, maddened by the one little thing he could protect, the only thing that mattered. His devotion had flayed his very soul, put it up for bargain for gods and demons, and now he was free, and he had even lost the only thing he was devoted to. Preserving that which was dead, because they weren't.
What does Vergilius see, when he looked at him? His unblinking stare kept on him, and he placed the knife back, never looking away. ]
I don't live in fear, Vergilius. Not of you, not of anything. I've met death so many times we are old friends now, but I always seem to slip away.
[ But he lifted those thin fingers, as if deciding where to act. ]
You want me to act, do you? [ He doesn't stand, but he doesn't have to. His fingers find that space on his thigh, where he knife had plunged in, and he pushes against it, fingers aimed to hurt. Even still, he didn't look away, like he wanted to see the pain on his face. ]
[A beast, huh? Now that's a bitter taste on his tongue if he ever tasted it. There's a brief flash of purple at the back of his eye - a snake-like woman standing above him, taunting him. Using him. In the end, the Purple Tear had her games, and he was merely a pawn in them.]
[Did she see him as a beast, too?]
[He stands still as the man's hands reach out. They broach the bars of the cage. They grasp the hide of the monster, and dig in their own monstrous nails.]
[He tries to keep his expression as placid as possible, but there's a low hiss of air that comes from between his teeth as the pain lances up into his muscles. Vergilius, as he said earlier, won't lay pretty.]
[His own hand reaches out to grasp Silco by the shoulder where he knows there was his own bite mark, sharp and deep. He draws forward, like a magnet, to hover his head above the other with gritted, animal-like teeth.]
[ Pain seared all the way down to his fingers, teeth gritted, a matching pair of fangs exposed by his lips pulling back around them, like he wanted to gnaw something in pain. There is an open wound there, skin ripped free from a bite that tore, a half-open wound that seeped blood when agitated. One of his eyes closed from the pain, but the other, it never wavers, staring at Vergilius as he presses in, causing pain like fire down to his fingers, arcing like a reminder of everything that his brain also hadn't quite forgotten.
How could it? ]
Of course, it isn't. I'm not done.
[ His tone forced out. He wondered if he wanted to hurt like this. Why else would he be back here? Was it because he wanted to let that monster out too? He'd said he wasn't hiding, but how often did he lash out? How often was Vergilius himself like Silco saw him? He wants to drag him out from the depths and just see what is there, vivisected and exposed. See what else could make a man as vile as he was?
He very nearly snapped his teeth at him, his finger digging in just a bit more, like he was trying to make him hurt. He reached up to press at the familiar space, where he'd sunk his fangs into, blood pooling into his mouth. Would it bleed, if he pressed at it? Would it open back up, and he'd smell blood again? He pushed with his fingers, his cigar still held between the two of them. The bright pinprick of it, heated, hovered near his jaw, like a little threat. ]
[Silco winces in pain. Vergilius presses in more. What does he want? Did he come here all the way just to hurt this man, make him cry and beg for mercy? Only a short time ago, he was merely checking in.]
[How did it get to here? How did his feet take him to his place? He doesn't want to kill Silco. Doesn't he? Does he?]
[The tip of the cigarette hovers. Silco pushes in, as if he can enter him and tear out his abominable roots. As if he could even manage to do half of that. You can bring a bucket to the blood-red sea. You can't empty it.]
[Only drown in it.]
...I'm not done, either.
[He says, his whisper scratching in the depths of his throat as the man pushed up with his fingers.]
[He twists to give him a little threat of his own. His mouth opens, before it dives down onto Silco's thumb, narrowly avoiding the tip of that cigar with the movement. His fang presses in as his tongue dives down, as if ready to lick up the blood yet to be spilled. And the key word is "yet".]
[The hunger is asking him to take away that "yet".]
What's wrong β [ He hissed out through tight gritted teeth. He was strong enough to handle it the pain. He'd weathered so much pain throughout his life, hadn't he? What was more? What couldn't he handle? ] β With wanting more?
[ How much more, he didn't know. He'd always been a hungry maw, desperately clawing and fighting for more, and more, and more. Respect, power, whatever his thin little fingers could claw together, first from the muck, then from the dredges of the undercity, and further and further; how hungry had he been in the world before? How much had he sliced off of everything for more and more shreds of it?
His eyes finally broke contact, only for a second, to dart to his fang pressed to his thumb. He hasn't even broken the skin, and his lips twitch, before he leaned forward, digging his fingers in harder. ]
[He's angry. He's so angry. That anger has always been there, simmering, and Silco has done nothing but dredge it up. Oh, he's tempted.]
[A little snap of the jaw, and that would be it. A crushing of bone. And that thumb would be removed as easy as anything.]
[He could do it.]
[He could.]
[The pain sinks into him, and his eyes flicker, like agitated fireflies-
before he pulls back with a hoarse cough. No, he's not backing off completely.]
[His hand moves from his shoulder to find Silco's hair and yank it back. Vergilius presses in his mouth to the crux of his jaw, sighing - he's shaking. He's trying to calm down, his words murmured into his pale skin.]
....I don't want to kill you. You dimwitted bastard.
[ His voice snaked out through a strained neck that still ached from the bruise that still lay there, a soft vibration against his lips. Low, coupled with something that isn't quite a chuckle, but there's a thrum of tension there, half like he's egging him on. Did he really want to kill him that badly? ]
Are you tempted?
[ He doesn't want to die, of course, but... Vergilius had Come here. He'd checked in on him. He'd stepped into his den, and now wanted nothing more than to kill him. He could feel the shake against his skin. Was it restraint, or was it something else? He doesn't understand him, and it leaves him agitated that he can be so confusing. He's used to sliding individuals away in neat little boxes, based on who they were. What buttons he could push, or direct. How to make them mad, or slip away silently. Why was it he didn't react exactly the way he'd thought?
He's used to his life being threatened.
So why didn't he?
His fingers never stopped digging. As if he could open them back up, expose the parts of him he wanted to see. He wonders if he should push them open more? The hand on his thigh is lean, and bony, but while he presses his fingers into the wound, his thumb moves, just slightly, brushing against his inner thigh. ]
[To be with Silco feels like a whirlwind, like throwing caution into a tornado. He feels broken, put back together, unsure where his emotions start and where they end.]
[He doesn't even feel all that conscious of his own body, as if its a wild thing of his own. His breath hitches in his chest from...is it the pain? Or the sudden shift against his inner thigh? Vergilius is taking deep breaths against Silco, as if to swallow whatever is left. It serves to cut down on the shaking, at least.]
...I am tempted.
[For what? He doesn't elaborate, here. His hand in Silco's hair holds him steadily as he takes in in another breath, before sucking in a kiss against that beautiful bruised skin.]
[ He'd thought the first time was a fluke, but Vergilius was such a deliberate man, and Silco knew that as well. He'd made up that it was a fluke, and maybe it was so that he didn't have to consider what it meant, and maybe it was another reason, and his mind wound around that like a question, over and over again, like that same puzzle he couldn't exactly figure out where all the pieces went.
No, it wasn't a fluke, was it?
This was a second? Third time? The whole... of everything was such a haze of blood and pain and everything else that he almost couldn't remember one moment from the next. It had been good, finding weak spots and pulling violence out of him, just like now, it felt like he was trying to drown in a sea of blood, looking for the vortex of violence in the middle. Like he could drag it out from the depths, and make sense of it in the light.
But can he, when he keeps throwing these changes into the mix? He doesn't know whether to be angry, or... or...
He realized only belatedly that he'd forgotten to breathe, and he'd done it without even squeezing his hands around his throat again. His fingers had stilled, and gone slack, still pressed to his wounds. He remembered to breathe, the sound too-loud in his ears.
He swallowed, the motion of it moved against his lips. ]
By?
[ He almost doesn't ask it, but he can't help but question it. He can't move his head much, held down like that, but his fingers seek out his free hand, fishing for it, to grasp it with long, thin fingers. ]
[It's only one word. But what a potent word it is. What is he tempted by? These vicious urges? Other desires that spike through his spine, sharp yet heavy?]
[He misses Malkuth. He misses the way she held him so dear, with warm hands that curved around his face, trailed down scarred skin. He's thirsty for a lot in this world. A better world. The laughter of children. And touch, yes, touch. It tears him apart. It grounds him.]
[Silco's hands thread through his. With his mouth where it is, he can feel Silco's heartbeat so distinctly that he almost feels like his teeth should be at his chest again. What is he tempted by? Does he even know? What answer should he give?]
[Does he even want this, or is this pure restless urge?]
[Vergilius sighs. The way they hold hands remind him of that time in the labryinth, two men standing at the precipice of everything. Well, he supposes he has an answer, as his grip squeezes, and he hisses into the other's ear.]
[ What manner of man comes to him here, after what he did, and says something like that? He hated what he'd done to him, or so he fails. He wanted to look him, didn't he? Or was it that aggression that came from something else, that want he hissed into his ear? He could imagine that he could hear the blood rushing in his ears, and he could almost imagine he could hear the blood thudding in his veins too.
Their fingers interlaced, just like that night when he'd thought he could pull the skin apart and look at the man -- a beast -- beneath it. His grip tightens to match his, stronger than his lean frame suggests. ]
Ah - [ It's somewhere between a surprised... Something and... A low note that almost sounds pleased. More honest than he intended, perhaps. He hadn't expected him to admit it, it was easier to ignore when it was unspoken, a trend that he could pretend he was imagining to see.
He lifted joined hands -- still held down, with his lips at his neck, he didn't dare move his head -- forced his wrist close to mouth, fang scraped against flesh, and maybe he drug it out for longer than necessary. He liked that, pinning him in place without holding him down; forcing him to dangle over a precipice. Did he know the kind of power he'd just given him? Over him? This is a sort of power that he's is unused to, but it still evokes that sharp tingle of excitement at the rush of it.
He bit into him, fangs sinking deep into his wrist. It's a contrast, not gentle or kind, but sharp, all points and rough edges, his hand holding him still, as if he couldn't rip his wrist away. Hot blood flooded into his mouth, one of his eyes closed from the rush. Did it taste better, knowing how much power he holds? ]
[Of course Silco is sharp. Of course there's no real warmth to find here. There's no comfort. It's akin to taking thorns to swallow inside of him, hoping to bleed internally.]
[It's what I deserve. For my hypocrisy. For my deception.]
[That familiar voice stands the test of time. Vergilius feels the man's mouth dig in as if its always belonged at his wrist, and a low noise vibrates out of his chest. Maybe it's a groan. Maybe it's the sound of a dog whose been cowed.]
[Yes, of course, the anger is there, and even though he's been leashed like this, this feral dog still has some bite. He will chew on the hand that feeds, and petty, spiteful emotion makes him lower his head. He sucks another bruise into the bouquet of the others, before he bites into...well, at least not his carotid, but its close. Too close.]
[He gasps at the flow of blood, but its such a contrast to the hands below - they hold each other tightly, but the way his thumb strokes upward is almost, vaguely, tender.]
[ His neck is already aching from the bruises; they seem to keep multiplying around him β as if he'd known what a weak spot it was β but his breath gasped in a sudden burst, when he broke skin, his fingers white-knuckled against his, fighting for composure that seemed to keep slipping through his fingers. The blood was a small salve on the loss of his own, but this wasn't really about consumption, was it? Not really.
It was about something else, maybe something like reminding each other about the danger they were both in from each other β Silco from physical danger, Vergilius from the danger of being wrapped up in Silco's little plans and plots β but Silco knew exactly the kind of danger he was in, and hadn't sought to step back; he'd so often had his life threatened that it almost seemed to be nothing β and yet here he was, allowing him close. Closer than he'd even allowed the demon he'd sold his soul to.
This was foolish for how dangerous it was, but there was the power too. Like he had that feral dog's leash, even if it snapped back at him and bit him. When had he ever wanted safe, or kind things? No, he knew that Vergilius could kill him, and wasn't half of the rush the fact that he survived? Escaped with only puncture wounds and bruises that he made sure to match?
He isn't satisfied with one wound on his wrist, he pulls his fangs free, but the blood pooling in the twin wounds draws his mouth back to the wound, his tongue pressed to the puncture wounds, and did the blood just keep coming? Was his heart pounding that hard?
He bit him again, a second mark just a touch higher than the first, the blood smearing over his lips and cheek, a soft, satisfied sound seemed to escape from somewhere in him, when he sank his fangs back in. The scent of blood hanging in the air between them just made him want more of it, to leave a series of bites down his arm so he couldn't cover all of them up and hide them away. ]
[He drinks from him. They drink from each other. It dizzies him, to think of this ouroboros of blood, shared from one to another. They're the same. They're nothing like each other. Paradoxically, both can be true.]
[Maybe it is the blood and the vampire hunger. Something to land his blame on, easily. He can use it as a way to maybe explain the palpable full-body shiver that comes as Silco makes his move. A whimper of a gasp comes from his mouth as he pulls away, head knocking a little against the other's.]
[It's horrible. It's so, so good.]
[Hunger asks for so much.]
[His legs tremble - he finds himself shifting forward as if a magnet begs him so, and settles on the man's lap. He dwarfs Silco easily. Perhaps it isn't comfortable for him. Who cares about that?]
[His mouth trails down, leaving streaks of blood, before he starts to gnaw along the edge of the clavicle he finds, a dog to a bone.]
[ Compared to him, Silco is small, thin and reedy, and Vergilius has almost a foot on him when he zeroes in on him, into his space, and it isn't comfortable, but he doesn't crumple under the weight of him, he only shifts, swallowing the last of the blood from the latest bite on his arm. He almost snakes back in to take another bite, but he's too close, and dipping lower, and β
The weight of him feels a little like he's trapped, pressed into the seat, he can't escape, and it's claustrophobic like everything from the blood to the air between them is shared, he doesn't feel like there's enough to go around, and it makes him greedy to find a way to dominate, especially when he holds him down like this.
The sharp hiss of air through his teeth was audible, his fingers instinctively found that injury on Vergilius's thigh again β pressed so much closer now that he was in his lap β and he dig his hand in, to make it hurt, give as much as he got. His fingers relaxed, and he released his hand, to wind it into his hair, brushing it out of his eyes.
He tightened his grip, and tugged, not necessarily to pull him away from the gruesome bite, but to keep him in line. ]
Careful β [ Half a hiss of pain, half a command. ] β Don't leave a mess on my shirt.
[ It sounds less in control than he would have liked. ]
[Silco pulls him back, and with the pressure of the finger pressing into sensitive, injured flesh, his lips pull back in a definite hiss, punctuated with a gruff groan. Oh, so he wants to dictate what he should do, huh? How bold he is. A small man who doesn't ever want to relent. He likes that. He doesn't like it, also, but Silco never would have attracted him if he was simply the type to let life roll over him.]
[Now that his hand is free, he's reaching up to slide over his chest, hook his fingers on the edge of his collar. His exposed eyes, no longer hiding under the shade of bangs, are vivid as ever, like jewels. Inhuman, really. Hungry.]
....Maybe we should get rid of your shirt. [A simple solution, right? His hand starts to pull down on the fabric, trying to find the nearest button to pluck away from its slot.] Save you the mess.
[ He met his eyes β so often they were mostly covered, it's almost surprising how bright they are β he thinks they look like a predator, aiming to consume him whole if he didn't bring him to heel. Is that a thrill? It's feels like... something, a jump in his heartbeat when he looks down at his bright eyes glowing in dim light, and his bloodstained lips from biting his way down his neck, and lower. Truly like that dark beast stalking its prey.
His fingers left the wound β lifted to brush the blood from his bottom lip with his thumb. Maybe chancing that bite again. His other hand remained in his hair, and tightened slightly, tugging it just a little more. Maybe a threat? A bid to stop, but β ]
Stop taking your time.
[ Maybe not a bid to stop then.
He met his gaze when he lifted his thumb to his lips and sucked his own blood off of it. ]
[Silco feels like a king on a throne. He's never cared for royalty. The man underneath him makes his proclamation, presses his finger over those seeking lips, and licks off the blood that should belong to him. Ah, see, that's the hunger speaking. But which one? The vampirism? Or something else?]
[Yes, Silco makes him hungry. A gnawing sort of feeling, a worm that needs to find the core in this rotten apple. He wants to ruin the man. He wants to ruin himself.]
[And so, he heeds it with a glint of a grin as his hand grasps the fabric and simply - pulls. Yanks it, really. With his strength, it gives way as easy as anything, and just like that, the exposed chest makes him dive his head down. No more going slow. He's attacking in a flurry of kisses and light bites, teeth catching on the edges of ribs as he hums the whole while.]
[In the midst of it all comes a slower, definite shift of movement as if to drive the man mad. His hips are starting to curve into his lap, heavy as they come.]
[ There is a part of him that enjoys the way he follows commands; a thrill because he knows possibly better than most that he could die at any moment under his hands. He's not so strong that Vergilius couldn't reach out and tighten around his neck again, or drain him dry, or snap his neck with a flick of his hands, the same ones that tugged his shirt open in a quick motion, obedient. That's power, and his skin prickled with gooseflesh β was it from the chill air, from being so exposed, or from the press of his lips and teeth?
The other part is wary β so wary β from being so exposed around someone else. Particularly around someone who can kill him so readily. It's that double-edged sword, slicing both ways, leaving him carefully balanced on that razor's edge, not sure if he will teter off one way or the other β but it's the thrill of both, suspended in the air, crushed under his heavy weight. He has nowhere to go, he can't escape.
It makes the slight gasp around his thumb sound shaky. Underneath his shirt he's as thin and bony as the rest of him, his ribs ridges on too-pale skin. He twitches under his lips and bites, welts and bruises already left in his wake. His fingers search for his neck, or his shoulders, like finding an injury to dig into would yield the same as his attentions. His lips part, the occasional breath escaped like an uncontrolled secret being spilled, because giving anything away feels like a danger, even shaky breaths.
His control slips, the first real sign of some of that carefully constructed structure is crumbling under his white knuckled grip. His lips peel back around his teeth, fingers still searching at his neck for those still healing wounds β They go still the moment his hips bear down on his lap. He's crushing, bearing down on him. It leaves him pressed against the seat, barely able to move, barely able to breathe, with his lips catching the edges of his ribs. He feels a little mad, powerless, and trapped, a flush her rarely feels on his cheeks and then there's the β press of him. His fingers abandon his neck, his hair; snaking their way down to his thighs instead, thin fingers digging into the meat, beckoning him closer. ]
[He could list a million ways. Any good killer could. But here's a way that feels like its worming beneath both of their skins - an iron rope hitched to each other's bodies, tugging and pulling with every shift in this impossible struggle. Vergilius gains power. Then Silco, with his need for dominance, gains power. But who will win? Is there a point to winning? Is it too simple to think that anyone could win, here?]
[There's still a part of Vergilius who wants to reach down to pull Silco out of the muck. He, too, despite all he is, should deserve to live in a world where he could be at peace, and that hunger could be once and finally sated. But now, a very different part emerges. Something pettier, more vicious than he gives himself credit for. Silco gasps underneath him, a lovely little sound, and the thought is realized - he wants loss of control. He wants Silco to whine and howl and beg. It's also what he deserves, doesn't he? For all he's done? For what he did to him?]
[More, more, more. Silco's spindly fingers twist over his thighs, thick with muscle, and he's bowing to the order of them. He rocks into that grip, slowly but surely, as if to drive him down into the depths. His injury smarts, and his clothes are wet with blood, but who cares? His own breath comes ragged as his hands make more work of this pathetic clothing, tearing it this way and that. His scarred hands make a journey down below, cascading over this raw frame before he pushes the man's shoulders further back into the chair so he's practically enveloping him.]
[A bite of a kiss to his lips. And another. Even as the rhythm continues, the threat remains strong.]
[ That is when he fights, struggling against his hand pushing him into his chair, but it does little good, it just serves for the impact against the chair to make him huff softly in pain, and the whole thing groan from the force of his body slamming against it. Something about this shifts, like he's grasping for an upper hand that slips out of his fingers like sand. He sinks into the seat as if it would allow him to find that distance he's clawing for now. Not from this, but what he needs for control. Over himself, over Vergilius, something to wrest the situation to his advantage.
There's nothing to grasp. Even with power that vampirism gives him, it's not enough. It's never enough, is it? He can't escape β does he want to, really? β and there's a frantic quality to his fingers at his thighs, somewhere between tugging him closer and pushing him away. Like a part of him wants to wrest back from him everything that he'd taken in one swift push of his hands. With his shirt open all the way β was it not just tattered at this point? β his fingers find that wound, a remnant of the last time he'd been with his back up against a hard surface and out of control. He did what he did last time, he made him hurt, because Silco had never been the type to give up a fight.
He feels like there's a point to be made here, maybe Verigilus is making one too, but Silco's lips curl against his, the threat of fangs scraping against his. Was this the monster he was looking for all along? Had it only taken forcing him into a corner to bring it out. His heart thudded in his chest, loud enough that the only sounds in the room are beating hearts, heavy breaths, and the creak and groan of the chair, fighting to stay solid while they poke at wounds and bite each other raw.
He bites him back, his fangs threaten to puncture his lip. Silco would always be a fight, he promises, there is no gentle acquiescence or fearful cowing β a fight for domination, and the smaller man still has tricks up his sleeve. He'll draw the monster out, even if he feels as much fear as pride at pulling it out, like he's reaching into his chest to dig out the horrible parts of him and put them on display. He wants to see it, no matter what it takes to get him there, and looming over him like this, he feels it. Fear, so sharp like a blade bubbling in his chest and threatening to spill over.
There's no room for fear. For a lack of conviction. He could not tempt the beast like this, and not expect it to bite.
His breath is shaky, bordering on a gasp against his lips. Just nearly there, he only needs to push him just a little more, doesn't he?
But Silco's fingers drift up from his thighs β thin, dextrous things, they move quick where he can't see, Silco's eyes focused on Vergilius's and his teeth snapping back against his with each kiss.
They scrape at the edge of his shirt, fingers looking for flesh to scrape against, and leave furrows from dull nails. Like he's trying to silently remind him who he's playing with β a reminder he's playing with fire, and that he'll burn him when he gets too close, if he's not careful. ]
[So Silco unlocked the secret here. He can have his beautiful monster. He has it here and now, and its a beast that is currently taking a little too much pleasure in rocking so decisively into his lap. Silco's fingers find his wound, and the pain lances like a whip into flesh, but it only seems to spur him onwards with a little hiss and a groan.]
[His own scars are testament. He has received all the pain he could bear, and not a single thing has been able to break him.]
[Really, all it has is just made him worse.]
[Silco's hands move and tear over sinewy old skin. More attempts to hurt, to gain some control over what he wanted all along. Be careful what you wish for. He grins a little, finding it somehow funny in the heat and sound of this friction. Oh, he's hungry. This doesn't feel like its enough.]
[Will it ever be? Or is it too late, now?]
[He's sucking on the other's jaw now as he abandons his kisses for this short moment so he can growl against this ravaged skin. The man's sweat is mixing in with the metal smell of the blood already spilled.]
You asked for this. [One of his hands drops down between them, intentionally kneading down over Silco's groin as if to rudely punctuate his words.] I really should take you to the bed and make you see stars. Haaa. It might do you some good.
He doesn't even get to the point where the words can form, in its place is another of those gasps, like it's yanked out of his throat before anything else escapes. Another little crack in that armor that is his control, but he swallows it back with tight-fisted grip, his fingers seeking weak spots that don't exist. There are no injuries to poke and prod at, more like dull scratches against his skin.
He'd invited him in, hadn't he? Asked him to hurry up? Could he say that he wasn't dancing with the monster under his skin, if he hadn't given as much as he'd gotten? Crushed up against the chair, he hadn't stopped him, when he bit down and ripped his shirt to tatters. Could he say that he hadn't asked for it when he was sprawled beneath him biting β kissing? β him back, and threatening to sink his teeth into his lip?
It was too late well before this, wasn't it? ]
Should?
[ He reached up to thread his fingers through that fringe of hair again, before he tugged it back forcefully to look him in the eyes. It gives him a good look at Silco, with his scar exposed and stringy, his lips bitten, his normally too-pale skin flushed. If he has any control left, it's hanging on by a thread. ]
You didn't strike me as the type to be all talk, are you?
closing my damn eyes. Anyways. here be nsfw and yaoi
[He does it again. Pull the hair back, yank it like a leash, force his gaze out in the open. There are not many who can meet it. But he doesn't think he's ever met someone like Silco before, who taunts him, defies him at every turn. His grip, a leash, his gaze, a way to control.]
[He doesn't want to be controlled. He wants to be controlled. How can it be, this paradox of his? He wants to be hated and he wants to be loved, he wants to destroy it all and he wants to be destroyed. All these years, he has kept the balance inside his wretched heart in check. It was easy to do in the City.]
[But Silco comes in, falls into his life, and that paradox reaches out with hungry arms to envelope him into the heart of this chaotic heart.]
[What a lovely flush. He memorizes it - a part of him realizes he was disappointed before, when Silco had turned him into a vampire, that he wondered if Silco enjoyed it to his core. Not simply experiencing victory, but pleasure.]
[His mouth shifts up, bloodied, into a smirk. And instantly, he's pulling back, slipping out of the man's lap - and he doesn't even give a second to breathe before he's pulling Silco up by the collar like he's a stuffed toy. He lifts him over as easy as anything, tossing him onto the bed before crawling in on top of him with vivid eyes and a mouth wanting to tear and kiss. Hands find the edge of the other's pants before yanking the belt off, tossing it against the wall, and pulling it all down up and over his knees.]
[Another kiss for you, Silco. But there's a hand to dive down between his legs as well to fondle over him before gripping him tight, solidly giving it a solid pump.]
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[About how much he should be pushed? Isn't that idiocy? Silco is not someone who could ever be anywhere near an idiot. And yet...and yet....he keeps thrusting that spindly little hand in the bars of the lion cage. He bears a knife as if that would provide even the slightest mote of protection.]
[And yet, this is a man who has bested a beast in one aspect. Who toyed with him enough until he bared his teeth.]
[Vergilius steps closer, now, shoulders hunching up more. He's always never had the best posture in the world.]
[The knife is laughable. So he laughs. A hard, gruff little ha-ha.]
...Put that away. If you really didn't want to stop, act with your hands, and your hands alone. Not pathetic tools. Unless you feel scared enough to hide behind it?
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[ He says it like it should be so obvious, as if it were the simplest thing in the world. Silco respected power, he always had, but the manner of the type of power was always in question. When pushed into a corner, how did the beast react? When confronted with betrayal, or bloodshed, did the beast shirk away and hide in a corner, or seek out those with more power, or did they lash out, and excise the problem personally?
Silco was not a foolish man, but around such things, he so often lost his head in pursuit of power. He had no freedom to help buy for the people here, or product to peddle. He needed something else to pay for loyalty, because he has nothing else to supply. He wants to see this beast out of its cage β ideally with his hand at the leash β because there's something in the man that makes him hold back. Show restraint.
What is that that makes him pull back? Why is it that he hadn't crushed his head like a too-ripe fruit plucked from the refuse? What does he want out of this?
They'd sat on and talked about ending a world once; an opportunity Silco had held in his hands, and tried to cultivate for two years, fighting everything and everyone to ensure it happened, maddened by the one little thing he could protect, the only thing that mattered. His devotion had flayed his very soul, put it up for bargain for gods and demons, and now he was free, and he had even lost the only thing he was devoted to. Preserving that which was dead, because they weren't.
What does Vergilius see, when he looked at him? His unblinking stare kept on him, and he placed the knife back, never looking away. ]
I don't live in fear, Vergilius. Not of you, not of anything. I've met death so many times we are old friends now, but I always seem to slip away.
[ But he lifted those thin fingers, as if deciding where to act. ]
You want me to act, do you? [ He doesn't stand, but he doesn't have to. His fingers find that space on his thigh, where he knife had plunged in, and he pushes against it, fingers aimed to hurt. Even still, he didn't look away, like he wanted to see the pain on his face. ]
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[Did she see him as a beast, too?]
[He stands still as the man's hands reach out. They broach the bars of the cage. They grasp the hide of the monster, and dig in their own monstrous nails.]
[He tries to keep his expression as placid as possible, but there's a low hiss of air that comes from between his teeth as the pain lances up into his muscles. Vergilius, as he said earlier, won't lay pretty.]
[His own hand reaches out to grasp Silco by the shoulder where he knows there was his own bite mark, sharp and deep. He draws forward, like a magnet, to hover his head above the other with gritted, animal-like teeth.]
Is that all?
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How could it? ]
Of course, it isn't. I'm not done.
[ His tone forced out. He wondered if he wanted to hurt like this. Why else would he be back here? Was it because he wanted to let that monster out too? He'd said he wasn't hiding, but how often did he lash out? How often was Vergilius himself like Silco saw him? He wants to drag him out from the depths and just see what is there, vivisected and exposed. See what else could make a man as vile as he was?
He very nearly snapped his teeth at him, his finger digging in just a bit more, like he was trying to make him hurt. He reached up to press at the familiar space, where he'd sunk his fangs into, blood pooling into his mouth. Would it bleed, if he pressed at it? Would it open back up, and he'd smell blood again? He pushed with his fingers, his cigar still held between the two of them. The bright pinprick of it, heated, hovered near his jaw, like a little threat. ]
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[Silco winces in pain. Vergilius presses in more. What does he want? Did he come here all the way just to hurt this man, make him cry and beg for mercy? Only a short time ago, he was merely checking in.]
[How did it get to here? How did his feet take him to his place? He doesn't want to kill Silco. Doesn't he? Does he?]
[The tip of the cigarette hovers. Silco pushes in, as if he can enter him and tear out his abominable roots. As if he could even manage to do half of that. You can bring a bucket to the blood-red sea. You can't empty it.]
[Only drown in it.]
...I'm not done, either.
[He says, his whisper scratching in the depths of his throat as the man pushed up with his fingers.]
[He twists to give him a little threat of his own. His mouth opens, before it dives down onto Silco's thumb, narrowly avoiding the tip of that cigar with the movement. His fang presses in as his tongue dives down, as if ready to lick up the blood yet to be spilled. And the key word is "yet".]
[The hunger is asking him to take away that "yet".]
[Patience, patience. Control, control.]
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[ How much more, he didn't know. He'd always been a hungry maw, desperately clawing and fighting for more, and more, and more. Respect, power, whatever his thin little fingers could claw together, first from the muck, then from the dredges of the undercity, and further and further; how hungry had he been in the world before? How much had he sliced off of everything for more and more shreds of it?
His eyes finally broke contact, only for a second, to dart to his fang pressed to his thumb. He hasn't even broken the skin, and his lips twitch, before he leaned forward, digging his fingers in harder. ]
What's stopping you?
[ Is he urging him to break? ]
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[A little snap of the jaw, and that would be it. A crushing of bone. And that thumb would be removed as easy as anything.]
[He could do it.]
[He could.]
[The pain sinks into him, and his eyes flicker, like agitated fireflies-
before he pulls back with a hoarse cough. No, he's not backing off completely.]
[His hand moves from his shoulder to find Silco's hair and yank it back. Vergilius presses in his mouth to the crux of his jaw, sighing - he's shaking. He's trying to calm down, his words murmured into his pale skin.]
....I don't want to kill you. You dimwitted bastard.
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[ His voice snaked out through a strained neck that still ached from the bruise that still lay there, a soft vibration against his lips. Low, coupled with something that isn't quite a chuckle, but there's a thrum of tension there, half like he's egging him on. Did he really want to kill him that badly? ]
Are you tempted?
[ He doesn't want to die, of course, but... Vergilius had Come here. He'd checked in on him. He'd stepped into his den, and now wanted nothing more than to kill him. He could feel the shake against his skin. Was it restraint, or was it something else? He doesn't understand him, and it leaves him agitated that he can be so confusing. He's used to sliding individuals away in neat little boxes, based on who they were. What buttons he could push, or direct. How to make them mad, or slip away silently. Why was it he didn't react exactly the way he'd thought?
He's used to his life being threatened.
So why didn't he?
His fingers never stopped digging. As if he could open them back up, expose the parts of him he wanted to see. He wonders if he should push them open more? The hand on his thigh is lean, and bony, but while he presses his fingers into the wound, his thumb moves, just slightly, brushing against his inner thigh. ]
Or is there something else you want?
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[To be with Silco feels like a whirlwind, like throwing caution into a tornado. He feels broken, put back together, unsure where his emotions start and where they end.]
[He doesn't even feel all that conscious of his own body, as if its a wild thing of his own. His breath hitches in his chest from...is it the pain? Or the sudden shift against his inner thigh? Vergilius is taking deep breaths against Silco, as if to swallow whatever is left. It serves to cut down on the shaking, at least.]
...I am tempted.
[For what? He doesn't elaborate, here. His hand in Silco's hair holds him steadily as he takes in in another breath, before sucking in a kiss against that beautiful bruised skin.]
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No, it wasn't a fluke, was it?
This was a second? Third time? The whole... of everything was such a haze of blood and pain and everything else that he almost couldn't remember one moment from the next. It had been good, finding weak spots and pulling violence out of him, just like now, it felt like he was trying to drown in a sea of blood, looking for the vortex of violence in the middle. Like he could drag it out from the depths, and make sense of it in the light.
But can he, when he keeps throwing these changes into the mix? He doesn't know whether to be angry, or... or...
He realized only belatedly that he'd forgotten to breathe, and he'd done it without even squeezing his hands around his throat again. His fingers had stilled, and gone slack, still pressed to his wounds. He remembered to breathe, the sound too-loud in his ears.
He swallowed, the motion of it moved against his lips. ]
By?
[ He almost doesn't ask it, but he can't help but question it. He can't move his head much, held down like that, but his fingers seek out his free hand, fishing for it, to grasp it with long, thin fingers. ]
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[He misses Malkuth. He misses the way she held him so dear, with warm hands that curved around his face, trailed down scarred skin. He's thirsty for a lot in this world. A better world. The laughter of children. And touch, yes, touch. It tears him apart. It grounds him.]
[Silco's hands thread through his. With his mouth where it is, he can feel Silco's heartbeat so distinctly that he almost feels like his teeth should be at his chest again. What is he tempted by? Does he even know? What answer should he give?]
[Does he even want this, or is this pure restless urge?]
[Vergilius sighs. The way they hold hands remind him of that time in the labryinth, two men standing at the precipice of everything. Well, he supposes he has an answer, as his grip squeezes, and he hisses into the other's ear.]
You.
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Their fingers interlaced, just like that night when he'd thought he could pull the skin apart and look at the man -- a beast -- beneath it. His grip tightens to match his, stronger than his lean frame suggests. ]
Ah - [ It's somewhere between a surprised... Something and... A low note that almost sounds pleased. More honest than he intended, perhaps. He hadn't expected him to admit it, it was easier to ignore when it was unspoken, a trend that he could pretend he was imagining to see.
He lifted joined hands -- still held down, with his lips at his neck, he didn't dare move his head -- forced his wrist close to mouth, fang scraped against flesh, and maybe he drug it out for longer than necessary. He liked that, pinning him in place without holding him down; forcing him to dangle over a precipice. Did he know the kind of power he'd just given him? Over him? This is a sort of power that he's is unused to, but it still evokes that sharp tingle of excitement at the rush of it.
He bit into him, fangs sinking deep into his wrist. It's a contrast, not gentle or kind, but sharp, all points and rough edges, his hand holding him still, as if he couldn't rip his wrist away. Hot blood flooded into his mouth, one of his eyes closed from the rush. Did it taste better, knowing how much power he holds? ]
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[It's what I deserve. For my hypocrisy. For my deception.]
[That familiar voice stands the test of time. Vergilius feels the man's mouth dig in as if its always belonged at his wrist, and a low noise vibrates out of his chest. Maybe it's a groan. Maybe it's the sound of a dog whose been cowed.]
[Yes, of course, the anger is there, and even though he's been leashed like this, this feral dog still has some bite. He will chew on the hand that feeds, and petty, spiteful emotion makes him lower his head. He sucks another bruise into the bouquet of the others, before he bites into...well, at least not his carotid, but its close. Too close.]
[He gasps at the flow of blood, but its such a contrast to the hands below - they hold each other tightly, but the way his thumb strokes upward is almost, vaguely, tender.]
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It was about something else, maybe something like reminding each other about the danger they were both in from each other β Silco from physical danger, Vergilius from the danger of being wrapped up in Silco's little plans and plots β but Silco knew exactly the kind of danger he was in, and hadn't sought to step back; he'd so often had his life threatened that it almost seemed to be nothing β and yet here he was, allowing him close. Closer than he'd even allowed the demon he'd sold his soul to.
This was foolish for how dangerous it was, but there was the power too. Like he had that feral dog's leash, even if it snapped back at him and bit him. When had he ever wanted safe, or kind things? No, he knew that Vergilius could kill him, and wasn't half of the rush the fact that he survived? Escaped with only puncture wounds and bruises that he made sure to match?
He isn't satisfied with one wound on his wrist, he pulls his fangs free, but the blood pooling in the twin wounds draws his mouth back to the wound, his tongue pressed to the puncture wounds, and did the blood just keep coming? Was his heart pounding that hard?
He bit him again, a second mark just a touch higher than the first, the blood smearing over his lips and cheek, a soft, satisfied sound seemed to escape from somewhere in him, when he sank his fangs back in. The scent of blood hanging in the air between them just made him want more of it, to leave a series of bites down his arm so he couldn't cover all of them up and hide them away. ]
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[Maybe it is the blood and the vampire hunger. Something to land his blame on, easily. He can use it as a way to maybe explain the palpable full-body shiver that comes as Silco makes his move. A whimper of a gasp comes from his mouth as he pulls away, head knocking a little against the other's.]
[It's horrible. It's so, so good.]
[Hunger asks for so much.]
[His legs tremble - he finds himself shifting forward as if a magnet begs him so, and settles on the man's lap. He dwarfs Silco easily. Perhaps it isn't comfortable for him. Who cares about that?]
[His mouth trails down, leaving streaks of blood, before he starts to gnaw along the edge of the clavicle he finds, a dog to a bone.]
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The weight of him feels a little like he's trapped, pressed into the seat, he can't escape, and it's claustrophobic like everything from the blood to the air between them is shared, he doesn't feel like there's enough to go around, and it makes him greedy to find a way to dominate, especially when he holds him down like this.
The sharp hiss of air through his teeth was audible, his fingers instinctively found that injury on Vergilius's thigh again β pressed so much closer now that he was in his lap β and he dig his hand in, to make it hurt, give as much as he got. His fingers relaxed, and he released his hand, to wind it into his hair, brushing it out of his eyes.
He tightened his grip, and tugged, not necessarily to pull him away from the gruesome bite, but to keep him in line. ]
Careful β [ Half a hiss of pain, half a command. ] β Don't leave a mess on my shirt.
[ It sounds less in control than he would have liked. ]
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[Silco pulls him back, and with the pressure of the finger pressing into sensitive, injured flesh, his lips pull back in a definite hiss, punctuated with a gruff groan. Oh, so he wants to dictate what he should do, huh? How bold he is. A small man who doesn't ever want to relent. He likes that. He doesn't like it, also, but Silco never would have attracted him if he was simply the type to let life roll over him.]
[Now that his hand is free, he's reaching up to slide over his chest, hook his fingers on the edge of his collar. His exposed eyes, no longer hiding under the shade of bangs, are vivid as ever, like jewels. Inhuman, really. Hungry.]
....Maybe we should get rid of your shirt. [A simple solution, right? His hand starts to pull down on the fabric, trying to find the nearest button to pluck away from its slot.] Save you the mess.
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His fingers left the wound β lifted to brush the blood from his bottom lip with his thumb. Maybe chancing that bite again. His other hand remained in his hair, and tightened slightly, tugging it just a little more. Maybe a threat? A bid to stop, but β ]
Stop taking your time.
[ Maybe not a bid to stop then.
He met his gaze when he lifted his thumb to his lips and sucked his own blood off of it. ]
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[Yes, Silco makes him hungry. A gnawing sort of feeling, a worm that needs to find the core in this rotten apple. He wants to ruin the man. He wants to ruin himself.]
[And so, he heeds it with a glint of a grin as his hand grasps the fabric and simply - pulls. Yanks it, really. With his strength, it gives way as easy as anything, and just like that, the exposed chest makes him dive his head down. No more going slow. He's attacking in a flurry of kisses and light bites, teeth catching on the edges of ribs as he hums the whole while.]
[In the midst of it all comes a slower, definite shift of movement as if to drive the man mad. His hips are starting to curve into his lap, heavy as they come.]
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The other part is wary β so wary β from being so exposed around someone else. Particularly around someone who can kill him so readily. It's that double-edged sword, slicing both ways, leaving him carefully balanced on that razor's edge, not sure if he will teter off one way or the other β but it's the thrill of both, suspended in the air, crushed under his heavy weight. He has nowhere to go, he can't escape.
It makes the slight gasp around his thumb sound shaky. Underneath his shirt he's as thin and bony as the rest of him, his ribs ridges on too-pale skin. He twitches under his lips and bites, welts and bruises already left in his wake. His fingers search for his neck, or his shoulders, like finding an injury to dig into would yield the same as his attentions. His lips part, the occasional breath escaped like an uncontrolled secret being spilled, because giving anything away feels like a danger, even shaky breaths.
His control slips, the first real sign of some of that carefully constructed structure is crumbling under his white knuckled grip. His lips peel back around his teeth, fingers still searching at his neck for those still healing wounds β They go still the moment his hips bear down on his lap. He's crushing, bearing down on him. It leaves him pressed against the seat, barely able to move, barely able to breathe, with his lips catching the edges of his ribs. He feels a little mad, powerless, and trapped, a flush her rarely feels on his cheeks and then there's the β press of him. His fingers abandon his neck, his hair; snaking their way down to his thighs instead, thin fingers digging into the meat, beckoning him closer. ]
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[He could list a million ways. Any good killer could. But here's a way that feels like its worming beneath both of their skins - an iron rope hitched to each other's bodies, tugging and pulling with every shift in this impossible struggle. Vergilius gains power. Then Silco, with his need for dominance, gains power. But who will win? Is there a point to winning? Is it too simple to think that anyone could win, here?]
[There's still a part of Vergilius who wants to reach down to pull Silco out of the muck. He, too, despite all he is, should deserve to live in a world where he could be at peace, and that hunger could be once and finally sated. But now, a very different part emerges. Something pettier, more vicious than he gives himself credit for. Silco gasps underneath him, a lovely little sound, and the thought is realized - he wants loss of control. He wants Silco to whine and howl and beg. It's also what he deserves, doesn't he? For all he's done? For what he did to him?]
[More, more, more. Silco's spindly fingers twist over his thighs, thick with muscle, and he's bowing to the order of them. He rocks into that grip, slowly but surely, as if to drive him down into the depths. His injury smarts, and his clothes are wet with blood, but who cares? His own breath comes ragged as his hands make more work of this pathetic clothing, tearing it this way and that. His scarred hands make a journey down below, cascading over this raw frame before he pushes the man's shoulders further back into the chair so he's practically enveloping him.]
[A bite of a kiss to his lips. And another. Even as the rhythm continues, the threat remains strong.]
[There's no escape.]
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There's nothing to grasp. Even with power that vampirism gives him, it's not enough. It's never enough, is it? He can't escape β does he want to, really? β and there's a frantic quality to his fingers at his thighs, somewhere between tugging him closer and pushing him away. Like a part of him wants to wrest back from him everything that he'd taken in one swift push of his hands. With his shirt open all the way β was it not just tattered at this point? β his fingers find that wound, a remnant of the last time he'd been with his back up against a hard surface and out of control. He did what he did last time, he made him hurt, because Silco had never been the type to give up a fight.
He feels like there's a point to be made here, maybe Verigilus is making one too, but Silco's lips curl against his, the threat of fangs scraping against his. Was this the monster he was looking for all along? Had it only taken forcing him into a corner to bring it out. His heart thudded in his chest, loud enough that the only sounds in the room are beating hearts, heavy breaths, and the creak and groan of the chair, fighting to stay solid while they poke at wounds and bite each other raw.
He bites him back, his fangs threaten to puncture his lip. Silco would always be a fight, he promises, there is no gentle acquiescence or fearful cowing β a fight for domination, and the smaller man still has tricks up his sleeve. He'll draw the monster out, even if he feels as much fear as pride at pulling it out, like he's reaching into his chest to dig out the horrible parts of him and put them on display. He wants to see it, no matter what it takes to get him there, and looming over him like this, he feels it. Fear, so sharp like a blade bubbling in his chest and threatening to spill over.
There's no room for fear. For a lack of conviction. He could not tempt the beast like this, and not expect it to bite.
His breath is shaky, bordering on a gasp against his lips. Just nearly there, he only needs to push him just a little more, doesn't he?
But Silco's fingers drift up from his thighs β thin, dextrous things, they move quick where he can't see, Silco's eyes focused on Vergilius's and his teeth snapping back against his with each kiss.
They scrape at the edge of his shirt, fingers looking for flesh to scrape against, and leave furrows from dull nails. Like he's trying to silently remind him who he's playing with β a reminder he's playing with fire, and that he'll burn him when he gets too close, if he's not careful. ]
nsfwish...
[His own scars are testament. He has received all the pain he could bear, and not a single thing has been able to break him.]
[Really, all it has is just made him worse.]
[Silco's hands move and tear over sinewy old skin. More attempts to hurt, to gain some control over what he wanted all along. Be careful what you wish for. He grins a little, finding it somehow funny in the heat and sound of this friction. Oh, he's hungry. This doesn't feel like its enough.]
[Will it ever be? Or is it too late, now?]
[He's sucking on the other's jaw now as he abandons his kisses for this short moment so he can growl against this ravaged skin. The man's sweat is mixing in with the metal smell of the blood already spilled.]
You asked for this. [One of his hands drops down between them, intentionally kneading down over Silco's groin as if to rudely punctuate his words.] I really should take you to the bed and make you see stars. Haaa. It might do you some good.
coughs probably... the rest...
He doesn't even get to the point where the words can form, in its place is another of those gasps, like it's yanked out of his throat before anything else escapes. Another little crack in that armor that is his control, but he swallows it back with tight-fisted grip, his fingers seeking weak spots that don't exist. There are no injuries to poke and prod at, more like dull scratches against his skin.
He'd invited him in, hadn't he? Asked him to hurry up? Could he say that he wasn't dancing with the monster under his skin, if he hadn't given as much as he'd gotten? Crushed up against the chair, he hadn't stopped him, when he bit down and ripped his shirt to tatters. Could he say that he hadn't asked for it when he was sprawled beneath him biting β kissing? β him back, and threatening to sink his teeth into his lip?
It was too late well before this, wasn't it? ]
Should?
[ He reached up to thread his fingers through that fringe of hair again, before he tugged it back forcefully to look him in the eyes. It gives him a good look at Silco, with his scar exposed and stringy, his lips bitten, his normally too-pale skin flushed. If he has any control left, it's hanging on by a thread. ]
You didn't strike me as the type to be all talk, are you?
closing my damn eyes. Anyways. here be nsfw and yaoi
[He doesn't want to be controlled. He wants to be controlled. How can it be, this paradox of his? He wants to be hated and he wants to be loved, he wants to destroy it all and he wants to be destroyed. All these years, he has kept the balance inside his wretched heart in check. It was easy to do in the City.]
[But Silco comes in, falls into his life, and that paradox reaches out with hungry arms to envelope him into the heart of this chaotic heart.]
[What a lovely flush. He memorizes it - a part of him realizes he was disappointed before, when Silco had turned him into a vampire, that he wondered if Silco enjoyed it to his core. Not simply experiencing victory, but pleasure.]
[His mouth shifts up, bloodied, into a smirk. And instantly, he's pulling back, slipping out of the man's lap - and he doesn't even give a second to breathe before he's pulling Silco up by the collar like he's a stuffed toy. He lifts him over as easy as anything, tossing him onto the bed before crawling in on top of him with vivid eyes and a mouth wanting to tear and kiss. Hands find the edge of the other's pants before yanking the belt off, tossing it against the wall, and pulling it all down up and over his knees.]
[Another kiss for you, Silco. But there's a hand to dive down between his legs as well to fondle over him before gripping him tight, solidly giving it a solid pump.]
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